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Pigeons   My sister and I were in the car the other day. She turns to me and says, pretty much out of the blue, "You know, if pigeons had theme music, I think people would like them better." I was near tears. To be suddenly thrown a curve like that was phenomenal to me. Who ever expects to hear something like that? Pigeons? Theme Music? Only my sister's mind can grab those two completely unrelated ideas and mash them together into one, coherent sentence. I was laughing inside at the shock that my sister could deliver such a random and funny one liner. I was laughing out loud because, after all, it was damn funny. And then the idea struck me. I was going to make, well, this. I'm sure you see it in your browser by now. It's my own, personal, hand crafted, Pigeon Themealizer (patent pending). The bottom buttons each deliver a different piece of theme music, and the top button simply turns it off. You know what? It actually kind of works. I mean, to you and me, that's just another, stupid, filthy, infected, automobile targeting defecation unit. A flying rat, as I once heard an old man refer to them as. But once there's music, however funny, my sister's theory holds true. Pigeons with theme music are indeed more liked than without - for without theme music, as my sister explained, pigeons are as they've always been; disgusting, boring, uninteresting, filthy animals. I told Dave, my best friend and Adina's husband, about her recent comment to me about pigeons, theme music, and the coupling of the two bringing forth adoration from people. To this Dave simply tells me, "Yeah. Adina's always saying that." I couldn't believe it. After I finished making the movie, I told Lisa, my bride to be and Adina's longest running best friend, and Lisa simply responded with, "Yeah, she's been saying that for a long time." What the hell have I been missing? I'm her brother! I've spent more time with her than anyone else in the whole wide world. I've not once heard this theory about pigeons and music. Not once! Oy. Regardless, I bring you this weird movie - something that shouldn't be funny, but for whatever reason, it's damn hilarious. I love my sister. This one's for her. CAUTION: This movie takes a while to load up the music. I'm taking for granted here that most of you are looking at it either at work where I'm sure you've got incredible internet connection speeds, or on a DSL or Cable modem at home. If you're using dial, for this stupid pigeon movie alone, I think it's time to upgrade. Click a button, wait for music. Please be patient. LITTLE TRICK: Stare the friggin' bird in the eye while the music plays, especially the Soviet Union's anthem. It'll make you cry.