Lisa’s epiphany for bathroom-décor first struck while
perusing the aisles of a Cost Plus store that had row after row unique
furniture and home décor
replicas. One aisle, however, kind of stuck out from the rest, and that
aisle has forever been known (to us anyway) as the Rubber Duck Aisle.
The first time Lisa walked down that aisle, she fell
in love with not just the rubber ducks themselves, but the different
sizes, colors, and
poses that were available. “Benjamin,” I remember her telling me, “I
just got the best idea. How about we buy a whole bunch of rubber ducks
for the bathroom!?”
Not even kidding around and being completely serious
I said, “Hell
yeah!”
So, Lisa bought a bunch of rubber ducks, I gathered my two San Francisco Giants rubber ducks (I got them during some promotional day at the ballpark way back when), she got a couple frames to put some of the ducks in, and we were set.
That evening Lisa’s big project was putting it all together
and, even though they only occupy a relatively small area of the wall
(and shower),
they did their job and made our bathroom more a part of our home.
After the placing of the ducks,
I had
three left over, and I positioned them as you see in Fig.1. I didn’t just put them there at random. You see, even though Lisa and everyone else that’s been in our bathroom like how the three ducks are posed (positioned as if one’s
talking while two are listening), in my mind I saw something else. I saw something
bigger. I saw something evil.
Rubber
ducks look cute, and they seem innocent – but are they really? Every time I go to the bathroom and I see those three ducks, in my head I can hear a squeaky, quacky voice coming from the higher, leader duck saying, “Duck Uberalis!” And I can hear the other ducks, the listening ducks, cheering, “Hail Duckie!” over
and over again.
That’s right. I see a Third Duck Political Regime when I look at those ducks. People who come into my bathroom probably just see ducks - I see a movement bent on world domination.
Oh sure, laugh – you might think it’s funny. But have you ever had to drop your trousers and take care of your personal business while an entire political movement looked on? I THINK NOT!
Beware the rubber ducks, my friends, beware the rubber ducks…
