I wish I was a Jedi.
I really do.
It's two days before my sister's wedding, and I guess you can kind of call the situation I'm in right now the calm before the storm. Oh, there's family here from out of town. There's suits that need to be worn, photo-ops that need to be attended to, and more hands to shake than at a political campaign.
But right now, before I wade knee deep into the role of Best Man, before I have to pretend that I really remember all the old ladies that remember me from when I was 'this tall', I'm sitting on my but, in my living room, on a lazy Friday off from work.
But there's one problem. One itty, bitty, teeny weeny problem. Oh, no, there's not problem with my sister's choice of the groom. No problem with the tuxedos or flowers or anything like that. The one problem I have is with the one thing that's currently out of my reach.
The remote control to my television.
It's right over there, I can see it, and I can't reach it.
The movie Tucker is on television, and even though I don't want to switch channels away from it, commercials are an unavoidable inconvenience. Now, instead of taking a quick peak at the Cartoon Network or SciFi Channel during these more than frequent intermissions, I'm damned by my own laziness to watch little clips of other programs that will eventually be on this channel.
It's right over there!
Out of all the super heroes that I've ever heard or read about, right now I wish I was Plastic Man. Even Superman has to have those days when he just doesn't want to get off the couch. Plastic man, on the other hand, doesn't even move save the hand he needs to grab that remote - that remote that's no more than four feet out of my reach, no more than ten seconds of motion and effort away.
I'd write more right now, but the commercial break just ended and I'll be damned if I'm going to type AND watch a movie at the same time. You can call it laziness to the extreme, I just call it one man's incredible ability to focus on one activity at a time.
